Thinking

Darkness...
7th floor...
Trains go back and forth all the time...
People scream, people shout...
Somewhere in the background, you can hear a police car chasing someone. They are angry...
You can almost feel it...
Its in the air, its in the atmosphere...

You are scared... You need to escape this maze that you've put yourself in, but you cannot...
You are too stubborn to do so, and too stubborn to ask for help...
This will be your doom, your downfall...

You lay on a bed...It still smells new... You take a look out of the window... You admire the view... And you cry...

There is nothing out there for you...
There is nothing in here for you...
There is nothing...

But then a smile magically appears on your face...
No hope, no dreams, no nightmares, no thought can take that away... It is a smile generated from the depth of you... From the core of your being and existence...

You feel better... You have made it through another day...

The fear though is still there, and it will always be. When will it strike? How will it come this time? Will I be able to cope with it?
When will I stop self-destructing myself?

Do I really want this?

Why...
Why!!!
Why???
why